Did you just move to a new city for that job opportunity you’ve been waiting years for but find that you’re struggling in the whole *making friends* department…
Creating like-minded community with a busy schedule in a new place or new season of life is HARD.
When Matt and I moved around multiple times our first year of marriage for his football career (Indiana to Arizona then back to Indiana), finding friends who shared our values and related to our season of life was like finding a needle in a haystack…
Or, maybe you’re a small business owner or work from home and tend to feel a little isolated, like you’re on an island and your friends don’t quite understand “what you do.”
Networking with others in your industry and connecting with people who GET YOU can be equally as hard.
Trust me, it’s been a struggle of mine, too. A lot of my work is very public yet the behind the scenes, internal business workings of a an online personal brand is tough for most people to understand and wrap their heads around.
One time my own Grandma even asked me, “Jord, do you work?”
Anyway, my point is, I get it, girl. Finding friendships that understand you and relate to you in the season you’re in are often easier said than done.
So, that’s why in this episode, I’m unpacking several of the lessons I’ve learned when it comes to effectively making friends and cultivating meaningful relationships without seeming desperate (even if you tooottallly are).
Specifically, I’m sharing a perspective you NEED to adopt ASAP as well as teaching you the following three key steps you can implement right away to start building new relationships effortlessly (instead of awkwardly):
- The 10 Foot Rule – a principal to relationship building that my dad taught me when I was a kid. My dad has been well liked and respected by all sorts of different types of people. He does business coast to coast, and is the ultimate party host. His secret to making friends and influencing people? If someone is within 10 feet of you, you acknowledge them and say hello.
- People love to talk about themselves. Ask conversational questions (vs yes/no questions) that invite someone you’ve met to tell a story or talk about themselves by beginning with the common ground of the context you’re in and digging deeper from there.
- Offer value first. Rather than immediately trying to get someone to be your friend or support your business, think of a way you can offer value first! Did the girl you met in spin class happen to share she’s trying to start her website? Do you know a great web designer you could offer connecting her with? Did the woman you sat next to at book club or small group mention she’s looking for a babysitter when she has a work meeting next week? Could you offer to step in and help for those two hours? Adding value to someone’s life first positions you as someone who is supportive and intentional, without being overbearing or coming across as desperate for a friend.
I dive into each one of these steps in more detail in the episode! Tune in here!
This isn’t easy, especially from a comfort zone. Go out on a limb, I dare ya. Amazing things can happen!
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August 4, 2019