High Standards vs. Unrealistic Expectations

Jordan talks about how to know the difference between high standards and unrealistic expectations
I'm Jordan!
...and I wear a lot of hats. I have an obsession with helping other ambitious women achieve their dreams while ditching hustle and prioritizing their well-being. Around here, you'll find tips and tools to help you do just that!
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Have you ever been told that your standards are “too high” or you have unrealistic expectations?

Yeah, so have I, friend.

And let’s be honest, sometimes it can be really difficult to tell the difference between having high standards (whether they’re for relationships, work, or even your health) and having unrealistic expectations.

It can be a fine line between the two.

While high standards can be great to have, if they start to turn into unrealistic expectations, you could be setting yourself up for a lot of unnecessary stress and pressure.

And none of us need extra stress in our lives!

But, the question is: how do you know if you’re setting high standards or clinging onto unrealistic expectations? And what can you do about it if you start to realize that you do have some unrealistic expectations? 

Well, friend, you’ve come to the right place, because that’s exactly what I’m answering in this episode of the SHE podcast.

High Standards or Unrealistic Expectations?

In order to understand the difference between having high standards or having unrealistic expectations, let’s look at some examples.


High standards say, “I expect to be treated with respect.” 

Unrealistic expectations say, “They can’t make a mistake or accidentally offend me.”


High standards say, “I expect them to care about how I’m feeling.” 

Unrealistic expectations say, “I expect them to read my mind and know how I’m feeling.”


High standards say, “I will give my best effort and be consistent.” 

Unrealistic expectations say, “I will succeed at everything I try.”


Do you see some of the subtle differences there? 

Look, having high standards doesn’t mean you have to be perfect. Because that’s the most unrealistic expectation of all.

I can aim for good things in my work or relationships and still be realistic about where I’m at by taking it one step, and one day, at a time.

Each day, I just try to be 1% better and take the next small step (while showing myself grace along the way).

So if you’ve been told your standards are “too high”, take a moment to remember that high standards don’t equal unrealistic expectations.

Expect respect, while still holding room for forgiveness. Hold yourself accountable, but show yourself grace, too. Give your best effort, without expecting perfection.

Learn More

If you’re ready to kick those unrealistic expectations (and all the stress that comes with) to the curb, then you won’t want to miss this episode.

Tune in to learn:

    • The difference between having high standards and unrealistic expectations
    • How unrealistic expectations can set you up for disappointment and unneeded stress
    • Examples of high standards and when they can turn into unrealistic expectations
    • How to identify when you’re starting to have unrealistic expectations

And once you’ve listened, let us know in the comments: have you ever struggled with unrealistic expectations? What helped you overcome them?

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Hi, I'm Jordan.
& I Wear a lot of Hats.

I have an obsession with helping other ambitious, multi-passionate women succeed while ditching hustle and prioritizing their well-being. My days are spent writing books, hosting the SHE podcast, and creating resources rooted in biblical values to help you do just that. Glad you're here!

Learn more


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